"if you're happy and you know it, you're unusI have no idea what im doing next year. Not one clue! I want to do so many things, i want to be everything but i cant be.
I have spent today tidying my room, though nothing much has got done, mainly i have cleared out some draws and found old love letters and old notes from friends i dont have anymore.
Some made me laugh out loud, some made me ask why the fuck i was friends with that person in the first place.
For those of you that are actually bothering to read this, believe me, this rant is going somewhere, though at the moment it may seem like its about everything and fuck all at the same time.
About 2 weeksish ago i broke up with my boyfriend of about a year and a half. It was a long time coming. I was miserable in that relationship, i felt like i was trapped, in a box. I didnt love him anymore and that was shit but i hope hes brilliant now. I hope he's realised that i was holding him back, that he was holding me back, that we were both holding each other back from being exactly who we both really are.
I need a job, i have fuck all money. Anywhere, just to make some money becasue i so badly want to go away with my sister this summer.
Looking at what i had like 2 months ago and what i have now i think maybe i should be miserable, i think maybe i should feel shit.
I spent the last 5 years almost trying to be happy, trying to feel better about myself, trying to feel like i had friends. I spent the last 5 years or so bouncing from mood to mood, at one point feeling so exstacically(sp) happy and the next bursting into tears for no reason.
It was shit, so unbelievably shit and god knows how many times i thought it would be so so much better if i wasnt alive.
I thought i didnt have friends, i did, i have had wonderful friends my whole life. I just wasnt happy with me.
The past 4 months i have got better, so so so much better and then today, sitting in my room, it suddenly hit me, i am happy.
I am that unusual person, the one who is happy and knows it.
That is me.
naughtyjames is dead?
what is that?
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It's the ADD talking.
RULES:
1- You can hug the person who hugged you!
2- You can't hug the person more than 3 times
3- You -MUST- hug at least 6 other people
4- You should hug them in public! Paste it on their user page! c'mon... don't be scared of public displays of affection
5- Random hugs are perfectly okay! (and sweet)
6- You should most definitely get started hugging right away!
-P.S. Hey! try some random people to spread more of the DA love around!
hello sweet pea
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Have a great day, you ace ppl, you!
I love lemons!
LOOK @ MY STUFF-I WANT COMMENTS...pls look....pleeeeeeaaaaaaase
Like your gallery!
I was asking someone what happened to naughtyjames.com - I hadn't seen any traces of Craig since before the London bombs, and I wondered if he was OK. Anyway, to cut a long story short, I was directed here.
Anyway it was nice to see you on here. Nice photographs. Keep it up.
- Jasper.
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itssamuel.com/blog, a tublelog
I wonder why you were directed here?...Well i am his girlfriend but still. Anywho Craig is fine. Hes still updating the 1905 project everyday so you should check that out.
-Sarah
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Please Please Please let me, let me, let me get what i want, God knows it will be the first time.
I posted the message just before I went away - and it was just after the London attack thing, and there were a few days where there wasn't any activity. But I'm glad you guys are OK - tell him I'm liking the recent 1095 stuff.
Take care, Jasper x
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itssamuel.com/blog, a tublelog
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Im a pirate
I love lemons!
Look at my stuff! I want comments
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